awkwardpers0n (awkwardpers0n) wrote in vaginapagina,

worried about abdomen and extreme stress surrounding doctors

This is really embarrassing but every time I have to have any sort of pelvic exam my heart races and I get REALLY wet. 2 doctors have mentioned how wet I get. It is sooo humiliating. Also one doctor sent me for blood work because she was worried about my pulse being so high (112 bpm). I think I need to go to the dr. but I am having extreme anxiety about it. I am having mid-cycle cramps and abdominal pain and stools that are really long and thin and bloating. I know I have a super-retroverted uterus. It's been going on a couple days, though it has happened in the past. I am worried about some obstruction either from my uterus or in my colon. My mom had aggressive uterine and colon cancer (she is ok now after 3 surgeries and chemo/radiation). When I was younger I had a really traumatic experience at the doctors and I think it is the cause of my nervousness/excitedness. I hesitate to call it excitement but I can't control it. I think it is because of my traumatic experience (basically I went to get an exam for scoliosis when I was ~12 years old and the doctor made me get completely naked and then gave me a breast exam and looked in my underwear for no apparent reason. Later that year I had to get a physical and the doctor insisted that my parent (dad) be in the room and proceeded to ask me really personal questions including about my sexual preference and experiences and then looked in my underwear etc. all with my dad there ). I feel like this experience has messed with my head and my ability to have normal doctors interactions. I am really stressed out right now and i think it is making my stomach hurt more. any advice? any similar experiences? I am so humiliated by this.
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