Sarah Marie (mangofandango) wrote in vaginapagina,
Sarah Marie

MMMMonday! FYI (if you haven't been reading social media in the past week or so)

It's MMMMonday! Each Monday, we bring you special, maintainer-curated content intended to enrich your VP experience. Please note that you can find past MMMMonday posts using the "mmmmonday" tag.

Also, a quick reminder about the other places you can find VP: vp_bulletins for local announcements; contact_vp for questions and feedback on the way VP is run; the Vulvapedia for basic questions; and don't forget about our sibling community over on Dreamwidth!

The other day, Kimberly Hall posted an open letter to teenage girls on her website. It admonished girls to stop taking sexy selfies and sharing them online, and it got a LOT of response from folks all over the internet. Today, we're rounding up some of those responses, and asking you to share your own! (Note for context: Hall's original post has been edited since this all went down, in response to criticism. Originally, the post featured entirely or almost entirely photos of her shirtless, flexing sons at the beach, and there have also been a couple of wording changes.)

Here's the post in question: FYI (if you're a teenage girl)

"Will you trust me? There are boys out there waiting and hoping for women of character. Some young men are fighting the daily uphill battle to keep their minds pure, and their thoughts praiseworthy – just like you."

And here are some of the responses.

Concerned Mom: Slutty Girl's Selfies Are Tempting My Perfect Sons

"Respect everyone regardless of their gender/sexuality/appearance," she might've said. "Don't worry! It's okay if you have sexual feelings! You're a sexual being! Girls are too. That doesn't mean you can treat them like objects. You and you alone are responsible for your thoughts and actions. Get over this Madonna-whore complex while you still can."

Dear Mrs. Hall, by

"It feels as if you know these girls personally. Austin is a big place, but you seem like the kind of mom who would know their children’s friends and taking into consideration the sharing of photos, it’s an easy leap. Did you contact the girl or girls mentioned to share your disappointment personally or was it more expedient and humiliating to just lay them bare on the pages of your blog?"

Dear Mrs Hall, regarding your FYI...(from Put Down The Urinal Cake)

"The last issue I had with your letter was on the subject of second chances. “And so, in our house,” you wrote, “there are no second chances, ladies. If you want to stay friendly with the Hall men, you’ll have to keep your clothes on, and your posts decent. If you try to post a sexy selfie, or an inappropriate YouTube video – even once – you’ll be booted off our on-line island.” And I guess, to be completely honest here, the reason this made me so sad is because I’m someone who needed a second chance as a young woman. And a third chance. And a fourth chance. Infinity chances, really."

FYI (if you're a human being) at

"Because she's learning. She just got this new body, her whole life is changing, she doesn't quite yet know what it all means, but she likes attention, she likes being pretty, she likes exploring who she may eventually become. And that isn't wrong.

And your boys paying attention to that isn't wrong, either. They are growing, too. This is a natural step in the boy-girl process and rather than shield your poor, innocent sons from the brazen, wanton come-on of the duck-face pose, perhaps you could empower your boys[...]instill in them the notion that they can be attracted to a girl or woman, and they can still treat her with respect and obey certain boundaries."

Koa Beck at's response

"The real issue here is sexist perception and the fact that we’ve culturally deemed a young girl in pajamas as innately salacious, but young men in bathing suits showing off their bods is just a wholesome PG time for all."

And this piece, while not a response to Hall (it was published before her piece went viral), is relevant and has been being passed around social media as well: Nate Pyle: Seeing A Woman

" It is a woman’s responsibility to dress herself in the morning. It is your responsibility to look at her like a human being regardless of what she is wearing."

So, superstars - what do you think of the piece by Hall? What do you think of the responses? Anything you think needs further discussion? Any criticisms of the criticisms? We'd love to hear your thoughts.
Tags: featured-posts, mmmmonday
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