I'm 22, and I've been in a monogamous relationship for about 7 months (also my first sexual relationship).
I never had a huge sex drive (I'd be fine with having sex every 2-3 days), and his is quite high. Still, we have a great relationship, I find him very attractive and I really enjoy sex, especially the emotional connection, and we've been having sex about 9 times a week since we started. Even if I'm kind of meh about it at first, I almost always get into it pretty quickly. Still, I can't help but think I might enjoy it more if we had it less frequently... I work out, eat well, manage stress pretty well, and take vitamins, but I'd love to have a higher libido so we match up better.
As for the pain: after the first time, sex was painful for about a week and a half, then it became comfortable briefly. (Almost every time we have sex he makes sure I finish before penetration to make insertion more comfortable.) I got my copper IUD in not long after, and we waited a week like the Dr. said, but sex hurt anyway. I saw the school gyno, who did the q-tip test and found I am slightly more sensitive than most, but not abnormally so. She gave me a cream and had us wait two weeks before having sex--this helped somewhat (my cervix was tender after the IUD insertion, which made hitting it hurt, so this gave it time to heal), but she left me with a discouraging "Some people can only handle having sex every so often." Seriously? Is it normal to be so sensitive you can't have sex as often as you'd like if you're otherwise healthy??
Since then, I've noticed all of the pain is at the entrance, and even waiting several days doesn't make a difference--no matter how long we wait or how much lube we use or how turned on I am, the pain never goes away, and by the end I'm often just hoping he'll finish up so the pain will stop... which is not a satisfactory situation for our sex life. :(
I think there's probably a physical cause behind the pain, though I have no idea what, and neither does my gyno. I'm seeing someone new this week, and I was just going to tell her everything I wrote here... any ideas for what might be behind the problem?? Thanks!