1:16 am - 08/31/2010

Pain from sex

My boyfriend is pretty well endowed. I am very petite. When we have sex, pretty much no matter what we do, it starts to hurt after 10-15 minutes. It's like a burning sensation in one specific place, and after that it takes about 36 hours for my vagina to stop being sore. We use lube, so that's not the issue, and I've used the same lube with other guys without problems, so it's not an allergy thing either. I think he's just too big for me. Is there anything that can be done to make this better?
I wear pads when i'm menstrual because tampons hurt way too much and I tried the Divacup but it was way too big and would always either fall out or cause a lot of pain (my vag is about the circumference of a dime and not very stretchy). Anyway, my period just ended and I used the same kind of pads I usually use. Last night I felt kind of sore and itchy there, more than I usually do after my period ends, but I shrugged it off and didn't think much of it. It got progressively worse, especially the itching, then while I was masturbating that night my entire vag felt like it was EXTREMELY swollen. I wasn't very aroused so I don't think that was the cause of the swelling. I feel fine today though, the itching and the soreness and the swelling are all gone so I don't think it's a yeast infection. Could it have just been an allergic reaction to something in the pads?
One more b.c. question!

I read the vulvapaedia article on skipping a period with a tri-phasic pill and I understand it's a bit more complicated than on a mono-phasic. I'm on ortho tricyclin lo and I wanted to skip my period this month. I'm nearing the end of the hormonal pills in the pack and I had a quick question. The vulvapaudia suggests starting the next pack backwards. So if the pills go forward in color from light blue to dark blue, I would start at dark blue and move lighter for this next month.

My question: could I start the next pack at the intermediate strength pill? I really hate what the strongest hormone week does to my body and I would prefer to not stretch that for two weeks. Or would that count as a strong drop in hormones and cause breakthrough bleeding? In terms of protection, it should be fine, because I'm still taking at least 21 active pills. At the end of the second month, it just will have been 35 pills instead of 42. Has anyone tried this and had bleeding?

Hello, fellow VPers! Long time, no post. Anyhow, my boyfriend and I's sex life is superb. We were having anal last night, when his dick slipped into my vagina. (Hey, it happens) Well, I was too into it to care so we just kept on having sex vaginally. Then towards the end he switched back to anal, and came. I was just wondering, what sort of health risks am I taking by switching from anal to vagina sex, without washing his penis off? I know I am prone to infection. Eek. Should I take some sort of precaution? Go see a gyno if symptoms arise? I'm just a little freaked out about the thought of having poo-remnants in my vagina.

Also; a relationship question if this is okay. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over two years, so we have discussed multiple aspects of our relationship. Our future, possible kids, blah blah blah. (He gave up the opportunity to go to a college that he is the biggest die-hard football fan for (Alabama), to come to the college with a football team that he despises (Auburn) to be with me. If you were from the south, you would understand. It's the same thing as Yankees vs. Red Sox? Maybe? Huuuuge rivals.) Anyways, to get to the damned point, we were talking the other day and he admitted that he checks out other girls. And me, being the hypocrite that I am, blew up in his face about how much of a pervert he is and how he disgusts me; forgetting that I check out other males. He calmed me down and told me 'Hey, listen. It's not in the way that you think I do. It's not like I gawk at them, or whistle or anything like that. I mean, do you check out other guys?' So, I thought for a moment, and said 'Well, yeah I do....' all the while thinking 'But, it's not the same....you're my boyfriend. You're not supposed to want to check anyone else out.' And feeling bad about myself. I ended up apologizing for blowing up at him.  I'm such a damned hypocrite because I check out other guys, and he checks out other girls, but I still can't get that bad feeling out of my heart when I think about him looking at other girls. It is fucking human nature to look at attractive people, so why am I still bothered when I know that it's just a thing that everyone does? Such a hypocrite. I hate seeming like a jealous little girl, but I guess that is what I am. I would just love some other's opinions. So my question to you ladies is:
Do you know if your SO looks at other men/women? How does it make you feel? Do you do it as well? Do you even care if they do it in front of you, or when you're not around? Why or why not?

11:52 am - 08/31/2010

ingrown hair

hi all -

i didn't know where else to turn. i have an ingrown hair on my bikini line that has been there about a month and is only getting worse :( it's painful and hideous and there is slight bruising around it and it has bubbled up.

i asked my wxer and she just told me how to prevent new ones, but nothing about what to do about this one. should i see a doctor? is there any way i can take care of this on my own? what should i do?

please help :( pic behind the cut, caution it's scary :( :(

scary and painfulCollapse )
1:30 pm - 08/31/2010


Anyone use the We-Vibe?  Thoughts? 
So, I had quite a scary/traumatic period experience a few days ago. My periods tend to be heavy and painful on the first day, less so on the second and then it tapers off. Most of my periods last 5 days.

It was the second day of my period (about a week after I used metrogel for a case of BV -- don't know if it's related), and my boyfriend and I were heading out to a bar to meet with some of his friends. We were on vacation, and I had run out of super tampons, so I changed to a regular right before we left, figuring I'd be fine for a few hours. Normally, I would be! On the way to the bar, I had some cramping, which I thought was a little strange as on day 2 the cramps are usually only present in the morning, if at all.

So we were at the bar for an hour and a half or so and I got up to get my dude and I some drinks. While at the bar, I felt a little weird, and randomly put my hand at my crotch. It was soaking wet. I ran to the bathroom and I had bled through my tampon, underwear and thick denim jeans. It wasn't just a little bit either. It was a good quarter to halfway down my thighs. After I pulled out my tampon and was trying to compose myself and clean up while sitting on the toilet, a huge clot just fell out of my vag. Needless to say I grabbed my guy and got home ASAP.

None of this hurt, but it FREAKED ME OUT. For a second I thought I was miscarrying, but I had been to the gyno a week earlier and took a pregnancy test and figured she would have told me if I was preggers! Since that evening, my period has been totally normal.

Has this ever happened to anyone before? WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?
4:38 pm - 08/31/2010

Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome

I couldn't find a tag for this, but I hope this is still appropriate for this group.  I recently returned from studying abroad to having terrible pain.  It was assumed that I needed to have my appendix removed.  When I woke up from surgery I was told it wasn't my appendix, but a group of cysts the size of a softball (and here I thought I was getting fat).  They removed the ovary due to the amount of damage and also the appendix  (because, well, why not?).

I'm good with seeing my gynecologist every year (even without insurance).  I'm surprised she never caught this.  I was wondering, from those who have PCOS about your experiences with treatment.  Apparently I also have much smaller cysts on my other ovary which will likely flare up in time.  I gained weight over the last four years and got abut hairier.  Hell, I thought the weight gain was because of college.  I also figured I was going through some weird second puberty, but PCOS may have caused both?  I've even returned to teenage acne, and I thought that was just stress.

Would some of you share your experiences with PCOS, how it has changed your life or bodies?  And could you talk about what treatment you have received?
 I started taking TriCyclen Lo in April, had a prescription for only 5 months, which ended two weeks ago. I'm unexpectedly in a new and very different country that doesn't have anything like TriCyclen and the closest thing we could find (and were recommended by a doctor) is another HBC called Lo-Femenal, which is a one dosage pill through out and is a tiny bit stronger than the last week of pill in TriCyclen. (TriCyclen Lo: 0.250mg norgestimate/0.025mg ethinyl estradiol; Lo-Femenal: 0.3mg norgestrel/0.03mg ethinyl estradiol). Today was pill 7 of the new bc. I know that switching types of HBC isn't really recommended but didn't have too much of a choice. Am I correct in saying that this month's new BC isn't effective? Because it takes the body at least a month to adjust to the hormones for it to be effective? And this new BC is making me tired and a bit nauseous all the time. 

Ok, so the thing is this is while we've been together for over a year the sexual component started only a little over a month ago and it's the first time for both of us. I thought I was well read and well prepared but now that I'm actually going through everything I feel like I know nothing and OMGPREGNANT?! every other time which is driving me insane. My need to talk to someone, anyone, is two-fold. 

1. Sometimes nothing makes him lose his erection faster than the thought, sight, or mention of condoms. Whenever we discussed sex we always agreed we'd use condoms even to the point where months before having sex I asked him to start masturbating with condoms so he could get used to the feel of them. It's not like he's not always able to maintain an erection with a condom, because almost every time he's worn one, he's orgasmed harder than he ever has. And it's driving me crazy that I have to ask him to use a condom almost every single time. And even then he might not unless I really push it and by that time there no need because bye bye hard on and that makes me feel bad. And because of that lately I haven't been that vocal in asking, which leads to sex without condoms even though we both know how stupid that is. And I feel even more stupid because I feel like I'm jeopardizing our future for his pleasure. And that afterwards, it's always oh shit we shouldn't have done that. And I hate that I have to be the one to ask when he said it was his responsibility just as the BC was mine. After-sex conversations are no longer "yay, sex fun!" and more of "we really need to actually start using condoms". I'm just frustrated, don't know what to do and feel like I'm seconds away from nagging which is so not conducive to sexy times. And I really hate that feeling of foreboding and that I'm compromising myself.

2.  When we first started having sex, I had near perfect use of the pill and we were also using the withdrawal method because of his aforementioned issues with condoms. But when it became apparent that I was going to have to switch BCs and can't be positive of it's effectiveness  this month we had a serious talk and agreed to move to condoms completely. Of course tonight is the night where I forgot to take the pill on time (5 hrs late) and had condomless sex. He did withdraw in time but this is where I'm freaking out a little. He's getting me a Plan B equivalent in the morning, so if I take it, it'll be within 16 hours of the sex. I don't know if I'm being paranoid and that it'll be ok, he did ejaculate outside of me. But am not sure if he'd peed from the last time he came. And then I think, damn, I just finished bleeding not even a full week ago. And then that we cannot, literally and figuratively, afford a child. (No, abortion really isn't an option for me for a plethora of reasons.) I'm not sure which ledge I need talking down from, to take or not to take. And if I do take, what should I expect?

Thank you for listening and for any advice you could offer.
So the situation in short: my SO and I just had an exceptionally long talk about his attitude towards going down on me, and a lot of his issue is the way my vulva smells. I eat healthy and I shower pretty regularly, so there's really nothing more I can do for the smell or taste. He wants me to rinse off in the shower before he goes down on  me, which I'm (grudgingly) willing to do, but he also wants me to use Johnson & Johnson soap because it's apparently pretty gentle and might help him be more enthusiastic about going down on me because he says that just rinsing doesn't clean my vulva enough. Has anyone used J&J on their vulvas, and if so, does it mess up the pH/lead to YIs with you? Am I being unreasonable at not wanting to use the soap, and saying that he can deal with me just rinsing it? What do you think? 
7:08 pm - 08/31/2010

Vote for RAINN

Hi y'all, I know this is an atypical post. It's a cause close to my heart, so I hope you will forgive me.

I am a volunteer for RAINN's online hotline. When I trained in July, my supervisor mentioned how much we needed support for it in Spanish. This month, RAINN will be competing for a Pepsi Refresh grant to do just that.

If y'all can go HERE and vote throughout September for RAINN to get the grant, it would mean a lot to me!

If you need help, go here for the online hotline.
8:50 pm - 08/31/2010

First vibrator


I'm looking for recommendations/advice on buying my first vibrator.

What are some good ones to start off with? I'm leaning towards more clit stimulation, not so much penetrative ones. I'll probably be buying online, so links are welcome! (And a plus if it'll arrive in a package that doesn't advertise to all the neighbours and mailman what I'm receiving).

Thanks everyone!
9:07 pm - 08/31/2010

Non-stop period

Hi you lovely Vag-pagers! I have a bit of a problem, and I'm wondering if anyone can offer any help.
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