May 9th, 2010

despair draco

Couple of first time/virgin questions

Hello! :) Someone referred me here for my questions, and I've found many of the older posts very helpful, but I still have a few questions.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for quite some time, and we're both virgins and as such both STI-free. We've been sexually active in that he's fingered me and I've given him blowjobs. Recently, we've started talking about having sex. Both of us want to, but we've decided to wait until I can get on birth control, just to be safe. However we've discussed condoms, and neither of us have any idea what kind to buy! I wish they just came "regular" haha. He seems to want to be the one to buy them, and he keeps asking me what kind I would like and I just don't have an answer for him because I honestly don't know! And I don't know how I would know to tell him. :( I barely know what kinds are out there.

Also, just today he told me he'd like to try to give me oral sex, according to him because I do so much for him and I deserve it. I figure this stems from an earlier conversation, and he really wants to be able to make me orgasm (he never has). Oral sex has always kind of intrigued me and I think it would be really nice, but I never really felt the need to ask for it, I've always been sort of content. I don't really know how to act or what to expect, and I'm really scared I still won't be able to reach orgasm and it'll make him upset... :( I think he feels like he should be able to, even though I've assured him its fine. I mean it would be awesome if he could, but I don't expect it.

Any advice/help would be much appreciated!

At my wit's end with HBC

Hello all! First post :)

I've been on Alesse, Diane-35, Yaz and Yasmin, all within the past year and a half. All have given me side effects I'm not willing to put up with, from migraines to weight gain to, I have reason to believe, fainting spells and irregularities in heartbeat. On the latest, Yasmin, I've had absolutely ridiculous mood swings where I go from perfectly cheerful to crying multiple times a day for miniscule reasons, and have random bouts of rage.

All these side effects range from annoying to really scary, obviously. The emotional effects (mood swings) have reached the point where I absolutely don't feel like myself, and it's causing me a lot of worry. I'm always second-guessing my emotional responses to things, feeling guilty about getting angry or emotional because I can't tell if it's valid, and so on. Even my bf has noticed the change in me (he's being really supportive about switching methods of BC).

I really want to try a non-hormonal method, because they seem to affect me badly. The thing is, I don't trust condoms as a sole method, and don't enjoy using them anyway. The only thing I think I would trust enough is an IUD. However I'm only 20, nulliparous, and scared of things going wrong with it. My mom told me about hers being expelled and having ectopic pregnancies - and this was after two kids! I know the risk of expulsion is higher before having had kids. I'm also really scared of the pain of having it put in and adjusting to it, probably irrational but I'm one of those people for who pap smears/ pelvic exams reeeally hurt and I get lots of anxiety over. Also, as a minor less important point, I've just started using the Divacup and really like it, and it would suck to have to stop using it.

So, I guess the point of expresing all that frustration was to ask about general advice regarding non-hormonal methods that might work for me. Also, maybe some encouragement for getting an IUD. :) I like the idea for many reasons, but it really really scares me.

Thanks for listening!


ok so basically, no matter what i do, take, wash with, i continuously get thrush after sex. i don't know what to do anymore, i'm taking a low dose of diflazole when i have sex, and i still get it. does anybody have any idea what the F*** could be wrong with me, it makes me so depressed, i almost think what is even the point in anything anymore, i mean, my partner and i have an amazing sex life, an amazing relationship throughout, and then and why do most women not have this issue? or rather why is happening to me? i know im probably sounding really childish, but i literally feel like life hates me. anybody have any suggestions as to who i could go to? any thrush specialists? i'm so unmotivated for anything, i feel like an utter and complete freak. please please please. :(
Emily playing
  • stufey


So I thought I had a yeast infection, treated for 3 days with a three day treatment cream.
It made the itch go away.. but now I have burning during sex.. we withheld sex for over a week after my infection, so now suspected I might have something else, because sex never burns like that and I was plenty lubed. But I'm also having a bit of urination pain as well, been downing acidophilus and cranberry pills. (thing is my urine is clear) Am I just confusing the area? because I don't have any bladder pain.. or could it just be that my urethra is getting irritated during sex? (cause the burning pee only happens right after sex). No abnormal smell or discharge..

I don't have insurance and the free clinic takes a week to get in..
should I just suck it up and wait for an appointment?

Should I go on HBC before the wedding?

I'm thinking about going on the pill before I get married in under 4 months. I worry that the fear of pregnancy could ruin our honeymoon (we are both inexperienced virgins). It would be great to be on the pill so that we can be as carefree and passionate as we want. However, I am worried about messing with my hormones this close to the wedding. I need time to make the appointment, talk to my doctor, and then I might only have 2 or 3 months to adjust to the pills before the Big Day. Should I just wait until after the honeymoon and hope that the condoms work?


cramps after sex

But I noted that everytime after I have sex, particilarly if I orgasm, I feel like I get mild period cramps immediately after.  Since my mother and I are far from open with each other, I decided to ask here - Does anyone else experience this, or is it just me?  If this isn't something that's considered "normal" do you think I should look further into this?  They never last long and they're never painful, so I feel like they're just saying "HAIII, YUHR OVAREE'S HURRR, KILLING TEH AFTURGLO!"  (Yes, my ovaries talk in very poor LOLspeak.)

Thanks ahead of time!