And the one before it: http://vaginapagina.livejournal.com/19697014.html
I took everyone's advice here and went ahead with the Planned Parenthood appointment, and I'm glad I did, despite the hour drive to get there. Not only did she understand my condition, but she wrote me a prescription for the birth control I've been on all along. She went above and beyond, putting my mind at ease about finding out my sister has cancerous growths on her cervix, and I was so afraid it was genetic or something.
And yes, she said my doctor is an IDIOT for insisting upon a pelvic exam- she said that since I'd never had sex and never planned to, there was no reason for such an invasive, traumatizing procedure. Rather than humiliating and terrifying, this doctor visit was pleasant and informative- she even said she'd call me with the name of a very good sex therapist close to my hometown, should I ever decide to seek treatment for my vaginismus.
Needless to say, when I get back from China I'll be looking for a new general practitioner. I owe all of you a big thank you for all your help; I wish I had the guts to come here on my main LJ account, because I feel like I shouldn't be hiding from you, but then again, this is the internet. Nothing is ever truly secret or gone on the internet.
I leave Saturday morning (flight takes off at 6:40am, ugh), with my full supply of prescriptions for the trip, and I have you and Planned Parenthood to thank. :)