Shady Raine Hazelgrove (shadykit) wrote in vaginapagina,
Shady Raine Hazelgrove

Libido problems

Hi everyone!

I apologize if this is a bit of a repeat post, I'm fairly new, but I'm starting to get desperate.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years now, and it was never as much of a problem as it is now. It comes and goes, but most of the blame lies with me and I don't know how to even go about fixing it.

Basically, I have no libido. Nonexistent. He's definitely got one, but he's getting sick of being the initiator, or me just kind of being there without REALLY enjoying myself. It's boring and makes him feel selfish, and I don't blame him for it. On my end, I feel selfish NOT giving him sex at least some of the time, but I can't help it. I just never really want it. Sometimes I can get into it once we start, but other times there's just nothing there.

It bothers me. It's not that he's guilting me into anything, it's that _I_ want to be able to have sex and actually like it. I want to be able to initiate intimacy. We fight off and on, but when it gets really bad we fight more, and even if he can't, I can see that correlation.

At this point, I really don't know where to go. I've talked to my gyno about it, but pretty much no help there. I can't ask for a second professional opinion right now because I'm a broke college student with no insurance, so I'm pretty much stuck with the Student Health Center. I'm to the point I'm considering quitting my HBC (I've been taking it since before I became sexually active). I graduate from college in a month and if there was ever a time to try going without it, it's now. My question is: will this even help? I know the answer is different for every person, but is it worth a shot? I've read a couple places that the pill can decrease libido, but I've also read that some women just don't have one to begin with. Is there even anything else I can try?

Again, I know that it's all different for each person, but I really don't know what else to do. Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated.
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