justforapicture (justforapicture) wrote in vaginapagina,

Dry spells & guilt & medical issues ALL IN ONE!

 Hey everyone. Thanks for all of your awesome responses in the past. You have all helped me so much through some worrisome times. I apologize in advance for the length...

Now, I have another issue. It’s about sex. As I’ve posted before, I’ve been having painful sex for about 8 months now, and have lost hope in curing it. It isn’t PAIN, but more extreme pressure. The only culprit could be hemorrhoids, which I’ve had for the same amount of time. Those, unfortunately, will not go away. I’m seeing a new gastroenterologist in hopes that it can be helped. He also cannot finish around me, which makes him somewhat nervous, I think. So that, too, can interfere.

Well, since this has started, and since my boyfriend and I have both started full time jobs, our sex frequency has dropped. We used to have sex 2 or 3 times a week, but it’s been about once a week, maybe every two weeks. Except for this week, which marks 3 weeks (period, then a busy week, then we fell asleep last night and he was late going home). I have this awful guilt about this. I feel like I need to give this to him to make it work, but he is fine without doing it all of the time, due to our exhaustion with work. I don’t know what it is that makes me feel guilty, maybe exes that have made sex a much more important part of a relationship. I’ve been with this guy for 2 years and I’m not scared he’ll leave if I don’t, I just feel like I’m not giving him everything.

I just woke up today and felt so awful for not having sex last night/the last 3 weeks. Is it pathetic that I’m even counting? I don’t mean to be so bent on it, I think I just hear about my friends getting laid 4 times a week and blah blah blah and I just feel like I’m totally screwing up my relationship (even though I’ve been going through some big, big issues and some severe exhaustion lately…). And will it get better? Have any of you had some “dry spells” on and off and worked through it? Any suggestions on how to break this spell?

Any help would be appreciated. Thank you in advance for everything!! Sorry if I sound like a total doofus.
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