First, a bit of background: I'm 23, n/p, and went off the pill (Yasmin for a while, Dianne 35 before that) 8 months ago because it was exacerbating my anxiety and depression issues, and thought I'd be better off with a non-hormonal method. In May, I got a copper IUD inserted (Flexi T 300) and it's been wonderful! However, I thought all my hormonal problems would resolve themselves by now, and while my depression is *gone* and my anxiety has been better overall, my body has been doing some strange things, and now I worry I might be pregnant, or that something is wrong with it otherwise.
First of all, my cycles have been getting longer and longer since I went off the pill. My last cycle was 35 days, and now this one is coming up to 36. I am starting to worry that I may be pregnant, because this cycle was in particular a terrible experience for me, and some things are the symptoms of pregnancy. I had a lot of nausea and my sense of smell was incredibly high, and I haven't had this happen since the first month or two after I went off the pill. My moods have been all over the place, and lately I feel like they are completely out of control, to the point where I am scaring myself (and my poor boyfriend). Sometimes I feel euphoric, other times I hate everyone and everything, for no discernible reason. For a while there during the nausea I had an abundance of energy and required less sleep than usual. However for the past 6 days or so I've been very tired, depressed, anxious, and emotionally volatile. I don't feel like myself at all. My discharge has been thick and creamy, no egg while mucous the whole cycle (and am not even sure I have ever really gotten it). My sex drive has been either non-existent or insatiable, though over the past few days it's been more normal. I remember about two or three weeks into the cycle having lower back pain, but didn't think anything of it, though now I am starting to worry it might be pregnancy related, even though I am not even sure my body CAN get pregnant, which leads me to...
I am worrying that I might have PCOS. I've always suspected that I have high androgens (acne along chin/jaw/back/chest, highly oily skin, thick dark hairs around my aerosols, some other things but I am not sure if they fit here), but thought it was on the normal end. Now I am not so sure.
I've also shown signs of insulin resistance, like extreme food cravings, hunger, difficult weight loss (though people say I am thin, I have extra fat around my middle that has just appeared over the last while and wont budge, no matter how small the rest of me gets). I notice that certain foods make me feel a lot different than others, and that I am highly sensitive to it (like wheat breads, ice cream, cereals, granolas, pastas, potatoes, rice, plenty more). When I eat those things I get very anxious, dizzy, headaches, fatigued, moody, and have uncontrollable food cravings. This appeared around the time I went on Diane 35 and has not gone away since, and I have been off for over a year now. I never had these problems before. I have a family history of diabetes.
I feel like my body is just completely non-functional right now. I am not sure if the above is a sign I am pregnant, PCOS, or worse, absolutely nothing and this is just how I am now that I've gotten older. My mom and boyfriend seem to think it's all in my head, and while I admit I have a history of hypochondria, I really don't think something is right this time, and since my anxiety has been better overall lately, so I think it might be real.
I am really in a low mood and just got in a fight with my mom because she is telling me nothing is wrong, and I feel so invalidated and alone. I haven't felt like myself in over a year, and I thought going off the pill would help, but it hasn't. I am incredibly angry that I am still having problems after being off the pill for so long, I feel like it's ruined me and I'll never be myself again.
Please, I'd be happy to hear whatever thoughts you have about this. I don't know what is wrong with me.