germphobe (germphobe) wrote in vaginapagina,

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HPV-1 (oral) Worries Unfounded?

Recently my bf's lip was swollen (not sure if it bruise or cold sore) and I didn't want to make out.  Then he said I was a germphobe and it hurts him when i physically shy away (from kissing).

I think our outlook is different (or maybe I am really ignorant about this as he is my first bf). 

He's had it since he was a kid and it comes and goes on his lip.  I've never had anything like this and everything I'm reading says I shouldn't be making out with him. 

Maybe i am immune and maybe I am not, not sure. 

His main thing is I'm the only person he's been with who has issue with it.  I guess his former gfs are ok with it and will make out, whatever.  He says it's a common thing among adults (late 20s) which is why he didn't bother to tell me/think it was necesary since I probably have it already or am immune.  It's never bothered him and none of his doctors have ever told him he should or shouldn't do anything (from a transmission standpoint) and he doesn't see this as something that I should be worried about at all.  The HSV test isn't a test administered on the normal STD panel as it is so common (?). 

Am I overreacting?  He's only the 5th dude I've ever made out with and I'm not really a "share my drink" with people I don't know VERY well type of gal.  Should I take a more cavalier attitude and carry the mindset of if i don't have it, it's ok to get it or maybe i already have it and don't know.  To his point, he has it and will always have it so for me to be so adverse to it seems to insult him and make him feel less than perfect (which is not something either of us want) and he doesn't understand why I'm so adverse to it (even if I don't have it).  He says it's just annoying infection, but not something that's ever hindered him and none of the doctors he's ever had has ever suggested anything that would make him worry about it for himself or about giving it to others.  My thoughts on this seem to put us at odds with each other as if I don't have it and he does and I don't want to get it would make it seem to him like i think he has something bad and i don't want to get it from him and he doesn't view it as bad.  (He also thinks he's invincible and to suggest otherwise is not good.)

His former girlfriends have been fine with it, it's never been an issue for him (even in outbreaks), and his physical well-being and physical intimacy (with others-- on a daily and on a very physical level) has never been impacted during OBs.

Am I really an ignorant germophobe?  Should I embrace this (HSV-1) full-on?  Super-confused.
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