I've been to the gyno twice now and he can't find anything. He gave me a estrogen cream, thinking perhaps the lining was thinning but that didn't really help. He did an exam and there was no pain deeper inside, but when he pressed around the opening that's where it hurt. I had an abdominal and vaginal ultrasound done and they found nothing but a few cysts, but I am guessing they are deeper in since he didn't think it was the problem. Right now he has me on an anti-fungal cream of some sort, don't know yet if it's working.
A quick google turned up a few message boards with at least a dozen or two women describing the same symptoms, all with no solution. Many described tiny cuts, like paper cuts on their labia. I have not have my fiance look to see if he can see cuts, but that's certainly what it feels like. Many noted that they have or are on antibiotics, so they're thinking that could be a link, but it's not for me since I have not been on any in a long time. It never hurts unless there is penetration, and then its sore for a few hours after. If anyone has any suggestions, please I am all ears. I'm getting married in 6 months and I so badly want to have painless sex on my wedding night (and to stop paying 50 bucks every time I go to the gyno).