3:46 am - 10/07/2006

Anonymous Post: Questions about Preventing Air in Vagina

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For the VP Team

I was having sex with my boyfriend tonight, and while switching from him on top to me on top (him staying inside me, it was a bit awkward, but we've mastered it), something happened, which ended up with my vagina getting air in it, and then of course, letting out a huge embarrassing vaginal fart. I have never had anything like this happen before, and he's the only guy I've been with, I'm still relatively tight. We've been together for two years (I'm 19, he's 21), and nothing like this has ever happened before. It made me want to cry right then and there! He shrugged it off, and who knows, probably forgot about it already, but this really really upset me. What on earth can I do to make sure nothing like this ever happens again? :(
queensugar 7th-Oct-2006 08:14 am (UTC)
Honestly, sometimes queefs just happen. I find they occur more often when I'm extremely wet... a lot of lubrication seems to prevent a seal happening during penetration, allowing air to squeeze out.

They also seem to be more common in certain positions (though what positions those would be would depend on your own individual shape, as well as your partner's) as well.

It has nothing to do with being "tight" (and remember that your vagina is a muscle... it doesn't really "stretch out" with use), and while it definitely makes a funny sound, I hope you don't feel too embarassed about it in the future!

It's really just the natural thing that occurs when air inside your vagina gets pushed out during penetration. What goes in must come out... that applies to air pockets as well.

When it happens to me and my partner, we just giggle it off... it is kinda funny! More than anything, it doesn't mean there's anything amiss with you, your body, or your sexual activities, and it's important that you don't feel responsible for changing anything to prevent it... don't let the laws of physics make you feel bad about yourself. :)
sand_woman 7th-Oct-2006 09:41 am (UTC)
She's right. Don't think of it as a "vaginal fart" - it doesn't smell, it's not got anything to do with digestion, it isn't gross. Laughter certainly, helps you both to relax. In real sex everything isn't air-brushed out, real sex is nothing like porn: that's why it's so fabulous, for being intimate with another person's body means being comfortable with your own and with theirs and sharing all the stuff that happens to real bodies in real sex. You become closer as people as you laugh or hug or talk and communciate.

Another note: Remind yourself it's him that causing this, not a defect in your body :) Also, if he's experienced it's likely he's had this many times before and is quite used to it. I would bring the subject up if possible with him, say "I felt embarrassed when this happened; how did you feel" and he'll be able to reassure you. It's amazing what communication can do.

I don't always try to keep my boyfriend inside me when we switch to me on top, reason being I enjoy his reaction when I tease and then slide myself on. Men seem to have a rush from pleasure from the point of entry (and it feels pretty good to me, too) :) So don't feel that keeping him inside is all that important.
athena_marz 8th-Oct-2006 06:20 pm (UTC)
ditto. The more wet I am the more likely I am to have this happen.
It tends to happen more when I'm on top or doggy style.
And my husband (only sexual partner I've ever had) and I laugh hysterically wen it happens. It was embarrassing at first but it's like a big joke now, and if it doesn't happen he asks if it wasn't good enough. lol.
memorygilded 7th-Oct-2006 09:59 am (UTC)
It's a queef. It happens to a lot of people during sex, because of the way the penis is positioned while it's entering the vagina. (Or vice versa!) It's absolutely, 100% normal. The first few times it happened with someone I was really embarrassed, but now we just giggle and keep on going.

Hope that helps.
bit_bit 7th-Oct-2006 12:20 pm (UTC)
I used to be ashamed of these noises, and would let the air build up inside me (because it inevitably gets there with my current partner). It gets painful and he isn't able to penetrate as deep when I'm full of air. We talked about it and decided that the occasional funny noise is far better than uncomfortable sex. Now I actually push the air out intentionally when we switch positions.

If your boyfriend didn't care, I wouldn't let it get to you. It is natural, it isn't disgusting, and in some cases it can be very helpful. I don't have any advice to prevent it from ever happening again if you still want to have sex.
mangofandango 7th-Oct-2006 01:13 pm (UTC)
It's not something you can prevent, but don't worry - it happens to most of us at some point or another. It doesn't have to make you feel gross or embarassing - it's just kind of funny, really. All it is is air, being squished out of a small, wet, squishy place. Sometimes, the space between my breasts squishing against my partner's chest does that during sex too! It's nothing horrifying, we just giggle and move on. :)

As others have said, try not to think of it as a "fart", because it totally isn't one. It's just something that happens, and honestly, if your partner's ever had sex with a woman before, he's probably heard that before too. It has nothing to do with tightness, either, so don't let that get to you (by the way, the idea that you'll get "loose" over time is a myth).

I don't know that this is my best comment ever - I haven't finished my coffee yet. But I hope the basic thrust (haha, thrust) comes across. Queefing is normal, most everyone does it, it's nothing to be ashamed of. :)
beachbanshee 7th-Oct-2006 01:39 pm (UTC)
I used to want to die when this happend. Now I just Laugh. My advice would be to laugh and he will laugh with you. It is totally normal and besides it really is not a true "fart". Just a release of air. {{{{{Giggles}}}}}} Have a good day!
bleedingcherub 7th-Oct-2006 02:07 pm (UTC)
It's not anything specific to your body, and there's not really anything you can do about it. I think almost every PIV-sex-having female on the planet has had this happen at least a couple of times-- I know I have. And I'm sure this guy knows better than to think anything of it.
jananaphone 7th-Oct-2006 04:28 pm (UTC)
I've never found a prevention for queefs. They happen to me every time my boy and I do doggy style. There's nothing we can do about it, and at this point, we're so used to it, we don't even giggle immaturely about it; we just move on with whatever we were doing.
iguanasdefuego 7th-Oct-2006 04:50 pm (UTC)
They happen to me every single time I have sex. In general, we've just accepted that at the end of sex, I'm going to queef and we've gotten over it. It used to embarrass me a lot, but I told myself, "Well, if he wasn't putting his penis in there, this wouldn't be happening, so it can't be *my* fault!"
vajd 7th-Oct-2006 05:46 pm (UTC)
And sex isn't the only situation queefs occur in either. The yoga exercise The Plough is really good for getting them going.

It's okay :) It happens to all of us.
jasminelily 7th-Oct-2006 11:35 pm (UTC)
There's nothing that you can do to ensure that it never happens again. It'll happen again, probably lots of times, so all you can do is just become more comfortable with it, as others have said.
hoodwink 9th-Oct-2006 02:01 am (UTC)
This kind of thing happens at least once to most women. There isn't much you can do to prevent it (besides trying to avoid what made it happen in the first place) but you can laugh at it afterwards. Accidents happen and you should try to not let it ruin the moment. Sex is a serious thing but also fun and silly at times.

I guess you should just be glad it wasn't a regular fart that smelled bad...hehe...

I hope this helps you feel better.
aki_san 9th-Oct-2006 05:22 am (UTC)
(Completely off-topic, but I love your icon!)
hoodwink 9th-Oct-2006 01:09 pm (UTC)
thank you:)
hoodwink 9th-Oct-2006 01:10 pm (UTC)
this would have been a better icon for this comment

My whole LJ is DT themed:)
cherryblossom_a it can kill you9th-Nov-2011 06:26 pm (UTC)
aside from the fact that its embarrassing(which it wouldn't be if you and your partner were comfortable with each other) it can cause an air bubble to travel to your heart and die....so does anyone know how to avoid that?
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