2:53 am - 06/23/2006

Tight Pussy

(I'm sorry if the word pussy bothers anyone, but I really like the term)

I have a lot of sex, but my vagina is still very tight. By very tight I mean that it puts noticeable pressure on a single finger on my boyfriends hand, even if I'm dripping wet. Most of the time it feels great but every once in a while it's extra tight and sex is uncomfortable, particularly right after my period (we have sex while I'm on my period so it's not because we haven't had sex in a few days) My boyfriend has the largest penis of any man I've had sex with, and after 6 months of almost daily sex my vagina hasn't become any looser as I thought it might.

So what I want to know is:
Is it normal for my vagina to have remained the same despite the change in my sex life?
Has any one else here experienced anything similar?
Does anyone else's vagina get tighter after their period?
mandaryn 23rd-Jun-2006 08:25 am (UTC)
To answer your first question, yes. Our vaginas are made to pass babys through them. A baby is a lot larger than any penis, and will stretch the opening more than 6 months worth of daily sex; fortunatly they do go back to their normal state.

I also have noticed that during different times during sex my boyfriend's penis has a bit of trouble finding it's way in (even with me guiding it). It all depends on the angle really.
scien 23rd-Jun-2006 09:46 am (UTC)
Yep, sex doesn't loosen you, despite all the myths and stories.
spankervision 23rd-Jun-2006 11:14 am (UTC)
I had this same problem once, okay, so it's not so much a problem really. My ex loved it though and once drunk he mumbled it felt like he was fucking a virgin. Which I had to laugh at because our sex life was pretty raunchy. We had fun with it, and I laughed once when it was tighter than every day and he would get forced right back out. He'd get forceful and the sex would be just as good.

Though, like the above said, it's really a myth that you'll get loose and flappy down there after constant sex.
brigittefires 23rd-Jun-2006 11:18 am (UTC)
I'm really tight too. The only suggestion I have is lots of extra foreplay, as the more aroused you are the more ready you are for penetration.

I get tighter after my period too, but the entire area always seems swollen somewhat that week so i always assumed that had something to do with the tightness issue.
emmycantbemeeko 23rd-Jun-2006 11:32 am (UTC)
I haven't noticed.

It's a muscle, so it won't get "looser" with use any more than, say, your arms or legs go slack from frequent use. If anything, frequent use strengthens it, allowing it to tense and flex more strongly and easily. But like any muscle it's possible to train it to be more flexible through gentle stretching and concious relaxation.

The idea that frequent penetration "stretches you out" permanently is a myth. If anything, someone who experiences regular penetration and/or regularly uses their vaginal muscles will be "tighter" (that is, more able to tense and flex them strongly- than someone who doesn't. The idea that virgins are somehow uniquely tight is part myth, part due to the presence of the hymen which temporarily provides strong resistance (thought it is just flesh, and once broken provides no more tension), and partly because someone who is new to sex and nervous is more likely to unconciously clamp down in a way that a more relaxed and experienced person wouldn't, much the same way you might tense your shoulders or your fists while nervous. A more experienced woman might be able to clamp more firmly, but is less likely to do so if she's not nervouse about penetration. Make sense?

Try additional lube- even if you're producing lots of natural lube, that can be very changeable (for example you may stop producing it internally but have so much on the outside that you still feel wet. It's a nasty cycle, too- a little pain can stem the flow, so then there's more friction, so there's more pain, so there's less lube... a little bit of added lube can prevent that and make sex much more comfortable.
queensugar 23rd-Jun-2006 02:21 pm (UTC)
I definitely agree with this comment.
sarahsvati 23rd-Jun-2006 06:06 pm (UTC)
Great comment. Thank you for dispelling this myth in a clear and logical manner. I think I'll add this to my memories for future reference.
coniglietta 23rd-Jun-2006 12:08 pm (UTC)
It's possible that the muscle along the bottom of your vaginal opening is tense. I had a lot of 'wind up', as my gynecologist called it. If this is the case for you, it doesn't necessarily mean there's anything wrong, just that you have a tense muscle.

You can massage your perineum (between your vag and your anus) to help the muscle relax.

You can also practice dilation exercises to help you relax. For these, lie on your back. Insert a dildo (it can be small), and then insert one or two fingers so they're lying on top of the dildo. (I have a hollow dilator, so I can put my fingers inside it instead of on top.) Gently push the dildo down towards the bed/floor/whatever you're lying on, and as you do that, focus on relaxing the muscle as much as you can. Release the pressure on the dildo; repeat. I tend to get tense down there when I'm stressed, and also during my period.

Hope this helps you for the times when you're uncomfortable.
kaelstra 23rd-Jun-2006 04:50 pm (UTC)
Yes, it's totally normal for your vagina to remain the same. Your vagina will not get looser because you are having lots of sex. That is a HUGE myth, likely propagated by men to encourage women not to have as much sex, and to remain as "virginal" as possible for them.

It's designed to be used for that. While it may stretch out for a few minutes to a few hours after particularly vigorous sex, it'll always go back to it's original shape and size.

This is why women who have children are still capable of having sex afterwards. Despite having something as big as a human head pass through it, after a few days/weeks, it goes back to it's normal shape and size, and it's ready to go again.
cthulhulicious 28th-Jun-2006 12:01 am (UTC)
"I'm sorry if the word pussy bothers anyone, but I really like the term"

Me too!

Thanks for defending the pussy! :-)
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